Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Save the Date: June 1, 2021

Today, I decided I've had it with dating. Relationships with me and men are doomed, no matter the context or compatibility, due to one simple problem.

They're free to find someone else.

Fortunately I found this:

These men are not only into working out all day long (hello buff abs), but they're aggressive, tough and 'men's men'. Possibly literally. I notice they don't indicate why they're incarcerated. Not that I'm going to be singling out the guys in for murder. I have other interests.

But I do like the posting of release dates. It's hard to plan a wedding that's 15 years out, but I can do it!

Notice their names end in numbers - very Jean Valjean. Hot!

They list them by age bracket - starting at 18....see me, I'm desperate in my old age. I'm an old maid, getting up there. But young girls aged 18 don't need to be starting out on convicted felons. I mean, start off with a nice young pot dealer, or your neighborhood petty thief. At least start with felons smart enough to get away with it. Then move on to the ones that got caught.

So I started chatting with John3623, who is interested in exercises, shivving, and getting his GED. We hit it off immediately, and I'm seeing him next month on his conjugal visit. Wish me luck!


kapgar said...

Um... good luck?

After blogging this, you may wind up with more than just John8675309 or 3:16 or whatever number he was. You may end up with a smorgasbord of men waiting on your doorstep. Watch yourself. ;-)

Egan said...

I think you're making stuff up. You're not meeting this guy. I do like this idea though. It's like the opposite of eHarmony.

Tracy Lynn said...

YAY! A wedding!You could register at the county probation office!We could have a cake in the shape of a file! We could have a Prisonbreak theme for your bachelorette party! And the stripper cop would totally fit right in!

Schrodinger's Kitten said...

Kapgar - oooh smorgasbord of men! No down side there.

Egan - you're crazy - of COURSE I'm not going to meet the guy. Although I gave him your number.

TL - You are my official wedding planner! And if I dont marry an ex-con, we'll still have the stripper cop.

Jean24601 said...

Hi Sara,

Nice to meet you. My interests include caring for whores' daughters, revolution, and bread. My favorite colors are red (you know, for the blood of angry men) and black (for the dark of ages past, of course).

Let's do lunch sometime.


Chaucerkat said...

Well that bottle of wine really paid off then last night didn't it? It's so refreshing to hear that women are starting to meet nice men again. I'm glad they have set that site up! You'd better act quick or else all the good ones will be taken!

Schrodinger's Kitten said...

Jean24601 - Personally, Red is more the color of a world about to dawn and Black is more like the night that ends at last. Obviously no compatibility. Sorry.

Chaucerkat - Doug1452 looks nice and violent. Think he's taken?