Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Amazon Recommends...

So, I ordered some hair conditioner on amazon.com, and when opening it today, I got a bonus gift.

A coupon for bagels.

Now, far be it from me to determine the logic that went into that decision. Amazon.com has recommended some pretty crazy stuff for me. I know somehow there is a method to their madness...but really.

Let's re-live the SATs for a moment:

"Conditioner is to Bagels as _______ is to _________."

a. pengiun ; non sequitor
b. Hart ; Hart
c. the shape of a bucket of water ; the shape of an eagle
d. Depeche Mode ; Flock of Seagulls
e. none of the above

Here's a lovely short list of the strange items Amazon has recommended for me recently:

Goji Tibetan Berries - I must seem the 'fruity' type.

Freddie Mercury Action Figure - Don't we all want one?

How to Mend Your Broken Heart (Paperback) - There's something you assume AMAZON shouldn't be aware of. Maybe I'm sharing too much?

The Edible Woman (Paperback) - Ahem.

What's New Scooby-Doo, Vol. 4 (DVD) - Who WOULDN'T want this? Rooby Racks!

Why Men Marry Bitches (Paperback) - Yeah, just tattoo the word ' hidden agenda' on my forehead.

Naked Chocolate (Paperback) - A girl's got to eat.

As I later washed my hair and used my amazon conditioner, I thought...'you know what would be really good right now?'

A bagel.


Cheryl said...

Amazon has never recommended food to me--I didn't know you could even buy food on Amazon. If Amazon knew me better, it would know that I love bagels, and all carbs, really. Stupid Amazon.

Dragon said...

A Freddie Mercury action figure would be awesome! Ok, I'm off to amazon.com now.

Schrodinger's Kitten said...

Cheryl - Amazon has everything, silly girl. Check out their coconut water.

Dragon - They also have Johnny Cash! I couldn't decide, so I got both.

Hyperion said...

Bagels have always been considered "book" food, but you don't want to know why. (It plays on an ugly stereotype.)

Well, okay, since you have lesbian friends that might one day put out homemade porn videos, I'll tell you.

The idea goes back to Jewish people, who stereotypically love bagels, and stereotypically read books. Personally I do not participate in ugly stereotypes, so these are not MY thoughts.

Then again, when you order a hip-hop CD on Amazon they send you a coupon for...

(I can't in good conscience finish that sentence, but I think you all know where I was going: more bagels!)