Monday, May 08, 2006

An athiest and a gay barista walked into a church...


"I love church."

Holy crap, did I just say that? For the love of Richard Dean Anderson, make it stop! Beezelbub, why hast thou forsaken me?

Ok..so it's not bad. Although the rector wouldn't let me take in my Starbucks grande latte, and once, that's ok... but every sunday? Forget it. But I understand...I missed the whole 'thou shalt not take Starbucks into a house of god' sunday school.

Once again, I've visited the holy edifice to witness the singing of Jay and Corinne Tuttle - the last remining vestiges of the Von Trapp family. They're cute, they're married, and the royal 'we' hate their double-threat talent. Jay sung beautiful baritone French songs, while managing to not actually speak a word of French. Did I mention we hate them?

The recital was chamber music of 20th century composer Francis Poulenc. He was described as "part monk, part bad boy," so obviously I felt he was speaking to me. He was also openly gay, which although not speaking to me, I felt was interesting to add...for a church endorsed and performed program. You may all raise your eyebrows now. It seems as if the church has become more liberal. Let's all say it together..."Halleluiah, Thank the Lord." Amen. This church also has a wine and cheese reception after the show...Amen for that too. My religion flows more freely while buzzed. But think about this...they admit gay composers but not Starbucks...hmm...I sense an irony, but I just cant pinpoint it.

I snoozed during the 'before' church service, but they had thoughtfully provided doodling cards for 'our youngest episcopalians' and so I crossed out episcopalian, wrote 'athiest' and then proceeded to doodle bibles and crosses. It's a compromise.

I was also given a survey on religion, and asked to fill it out...but after bubbling the first 3 pages 'No', "Does not apply' and 'Never' I figured I didn't need to skew the numbers anymore. They might think there were athiests in their midst. We prefer to go unnoticed, but the bursting into flames is usually our giveaway.

So all in all, a lovely afternoon in church...the only uncomfortable part was the whole 'kneeling before thy god' thing in the service. It got me in a bit of a twitter, but otherwise I survived unscathed. And in case you're wondering, no, I did not kneel. It's against my religion.

3 comments:

Egan said...

Je comprends que tu aimes le café. Merci et bon courage mon amie!

Schrodinger's Kitten said...

Oui, le Starbucks cafe est bon! mmmm...tres bon!

Merci!

Tracy Lynn said...

You really were as safe as houses, for Episcopalians are totally down with gays and would not DREAM of having the cheese without the wine. As for the atheism, they consider that merely an excuse for debate, which they do, endlessly, amongst themselves and with anyone who wants to join in.

Can you tell I'm a cradle Episcopalian (non-practicing, but again, nobody really cares or gives me grief when I show up for the occasional Christmas service.).